The Curious Scalpel

First post in a long time... I'm post-call and don't want to sleep so my internal clock doesn't get screwed up (more than it already is). As the title suggests, I have been busy, though you probably knew that since I'm a second-year resident and those tend to be busy people. But the best part of it is what I've been busy doing: operating.  Finally I've been getting to do some real stuff in the O.R. Hip fractures, joint replacements, carpal tunnels, arthroscopies. I was on call a few weeks ago and got to do my first hip fracture case, pretty much on my own, with some supervision from the attending. It's fun.  I've also had some pretty wild experiences. I was on call during a recent holiday celebration, when I was called into the ER for a patient with a small finger partial amputation. The ED doctors neglected to mention the guy's other injury, though. Imagine my surprise when I get down there and the guy has brain herniating through his newly sp...

While cleaning up some papers around my desk at home (i.e. looking for something), I found a folded up piece of notepad paper. On the outside, it looks like an ordinary piece of college-ruled paper, maybe what one would use for a grocery list. But even though I hadn't seen this little scrap in about 9 months, I instantly recognized it for what it was, and instead of tossing it in the "trash" pile, I put it aside to look at later.  This little scrap carried the hastily scribbled headline, "Hospital stories." Listed below that were brief summaries of what I thought were unique and interesting stories from my experiences as an intern. There were eight one-liners written in extreme shorthand which I assumed, that day, that I would still be able to decipher whenever it was that I got around to reading it again.  After I finished cleaning (i.e. got bored and forgot what I was looking for), I picked up this little scrap intending to reminisce about these storie...